TSP: 51 Just Thinking for a Moment

I am ready for a career. I have 8 quarters and one year of rotations before I can take the exam to become a pharmacist. That's 1600 hours of experience and roughly three and a half years of concentrated effort.

As I've gotten older my wants have changed considerably. I used to want to buy my grandparent's house and raise alpaca, making a living selling stuff and taking pictures while traveling. In elementary school, I wanted to be the President of the United States or as my dad reminds me occasionally, "a pediatric veterinarian for chimpanzees and armadillos. Chimpanzees because they were my favorite and armadillos because they were underrepresented." I was a strange kid, but that's not my point.

My point is that now, I want what a lot of people want. I want to make a small difference - to have a successful career, making small positive changes in my field. To marry someone that I love and build a strong loving family network. I still want to travel, but the idea of a permanent house somewhere, with a fireplace, a dog,  (possibly a ceramics studio), is even more appealing. My dreams have become more ~ real. 

I hope that I didn't grow up too much.

~ Sarah

 

TSP 50: Work and Water

I'm at the University of Washington South Campus Center studying for Autumn Quarter finals. This week will encompass five of my very first finals as a doctoral student, and I'm staring out the window at the water, like a second grader daydreaming in math class.

Pharmacy school is way harder than I thought it would be. While I'm prepared, I do believe that it is the hardest thing I've ever tried to accomplish. My mother and I had a conversation a few days ago. It was about how I grew up defining myself by the success I had in school. When you get straight As and your family is proud of you, eventually you start to see yourself as the one that is good at school. Then you feel like you've failed if you do any less than Summa Cum Laude.  I realized that my internal pressure to be perfect academically isn't exactly healthy. I don't want to be defined only for my academic success. I want to do well, but I also want to get better at ceramics, fall in love, make life long friends and keep them, and lose the stress weight. There is so much more to me than books.

So hence, while I haven't made as much progress figuring out who I am as I'd like, at least this week I figured out why.

And for your information, I am proud that I'm going to hold on to Bs this week. And that I can relax a bit and still succeed.

Anyone want to tell me how they define their success?

Sincerely,
Sarah Buterblog

P.S. As soon as I have a bit more time, I'm going to tell you about Jason. Jason is my boyfriend and he is a really sweet guy. Its been hard for me to admit that I'm excited to be with someone again. And that this relationship could last. It takes me a long time to tell him that I'm upset. It takes him about three minutes to fix it. More to come, I promise. - Sarah

TSP 49: I'm Not A Writer

I know that you don't want a list of the things I've been doing tonight. Or the things I'm doing right now. I could give you a lesson on science, reiterate the antioxidant properties of blueberries, or have a classic introspective Buterblog moment of angst.

Or I could just level with you. I'm not sure where I'm going with this blog tonight. I tried to illicit a striking moment of brilliance. I had a cup of Trader Joe's Vanilla and Cinnamon tea in my beautiful hand-thrown pottery mug. Realizing that wasn't enough, I started drinking a bottle of Shock Top. I won't admit to drinking both at the same time with different hands, but that may or may not have happened.

Moving on, I'll let some actual writers have your attention:

Wordless Scribe
Doug Wood is traveling around the world writing about his experiences. I've watched him grow into his own skin, and in my opinion he is one of the best writers of my generation. His voice is honest, real, and comes from a place of sharing within him that the rest of us wish we could access in ourselves. While I tried hard not to make mistakes in high school and beyond, Doug learned from his and became a better person. But I digress, you could just simply follow his blog.

 "There are things you just can't do in life. You can't beat the phone company, you can't make a waiter see you until he's ready to see you, and you can't go home again." ~ Bill Bryson.

Bill Bryson is one of my favorite travel writers. I suggest starting with his novel about hiking the Appalachian Trail,  A Walk in the Woods.

And lastly, someone who is not a travel writer, but is laugh-out-loud-on-the-airplane funny, Justin Halpern. Justin Halpern wrote Shit My Dad Says, after becoming internet famous for quoting his father. If you need a pick me up its an easy read, or pick up a copy of his, I Suck At Girls.

Thank God that there are good writers out there. I much more of a reader myself.

So, fabulous friends, what are you reading? Or, perhaps, writing?

Sincerely,
Sarah