What do you want to do?

People ask...

What do you want to do?
And what will you do with that after graduation?
And why did you choose that?

They mean - how is what you are doing now going to get you where you want to be? How is it profiting you/why is it important?

I understand financial security. I understand making money for your future. I understand Roth IRAs and benefits and insurance. I understand the steps it takes to climb the corporate ladder and that we must become working members of society.

I don't understand how this is any measure of success.
I don't understand why I have to wait to do what I really want to do, until I don't have to worry about the things above. I will always have to keep those things in mind - but I don't have to focus on them. I think I can truly have it all - and my definition of that.

>>>>>>>> This is what I want to do. <<<<<<<<<<<

Embrace God
Take a Mediterranean Cruise
Master Chaos Theory
Study Ceramics in Japan
Write a Screenplay
Travel to More African Countries than My Father
Buy a House on the Beach
Bowl a Perfect 300
Build a Sand Castle on a Spanish Nude Beach
Become a Top French Chef
Design Costumes for Broadway
Market my Own Designer Shoes

Bring it on!

To Sink or Swim? But a Happy Birthday Nonetheless...

Hi.

Things are upside down right now. My grandmother passed away this past Thanksgiving, and her memorial is a few days before Christmas. If there is one thing that I'd ask Santa Claus for - it would be to go to her memorial service in Oklahoma. However, I have jury duty, and because I've postponed it once for school; it looks dismal that I'll legally be allowed to leave the state.

It's my 21st birthday today. I have gotten up at 2am to study for a 7:30am final, hung out with one of my best friends for an hour or so, slept for four or five hours, watched tv online, and put off studying for my final tomorrow. Which, I will promptly do after this post, at least that's what I've been telling myself. The importance of everything is so backwards. All I know is that I will make it through one day at a time and take life as it comes. I just don't know anything else.

There is one more problem. I love him, but things are class 5 white water rapids at the moment. We've been pattling in opposite directions and I'm pretty sure we flipped the raft. The question is if we can get back in. He says hes holding his hand out - I just don't know if I'm close enough to the raft anymore to grab hold. Although I want to. I just don't want to drown fighting the tide.  And I'm exhausted. Sometimes you do too much to keep your head above water, believeing you can't breath under it. But maybe, just maybe, you can breathe in water.

It's sink or swim, but in the mean time, I could use a drink. Any suggestions?

Sincerely,
Sarah

Thanks

I was going write about something, and then I stopped for a second and thought about what my bible study has been discussing and my mind wandered to some of the things going on in the life of one of my closest friends. While it has absolutely nothing to do with me, I am constantly reminded about how strong, lets call her, Jamie, is. Jamie has not only brought sunshine into my life, but has encouraged and loved me, while her life has been drug through the mud. I will respect her privacy and omit details, but in her greatest time of need, all Jamie did was be there for me.

I know that Jamie knows that if she needs anything, I will be there. I know that she relies on me to be there physically to talk to and be with. I hope that I can support her with what she is dealing with in the appropriate way. Its on a scope that none of us have had to handle. In a unique way, I love you, Jamie. Whatever happens - I am right here. I got you. But also - Thank you. Thank you for reminding me of how I should be. Thank you for showing me that you can be strong and weak at the same time, and that you can rely on others. Thank you for giving me an example of how to be.

So, while I was going to direct a post toward certain people that have pissed me off, certain people all wrapped up in each other, I'd rather direct a post toward Jamie. Someone that I truly have to be thankful for.

Because I can't tell you directly - I'm telling you here - Thank you, Jamie. And I'm here for you. I got you. You and yours are in my prayers, and in the prayers of so many.

Happy (Early) Thanksgiving.

Sincerely,
Sarah